She's JV to your varsity
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
I want you to know that the guy who peed in your bed got fat.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
