just tell him i said nine months
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
Remember when we were mad at her for brining her mom on spring break? She just won the wet t-shirt contest. I think we owe her an apology.
There's an official council for his ex boyfriends. They told me they 'look forward to the day I join them'.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
He was the one that got away. From my vagina.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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