nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
Turns out Woolite can get the cum stains out of her moms couch.
Hooking up with one of the deadbeat dads from Teen Mom does not qualify as banging a celebrity.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
Will you remind me I changed my hotspot phone password to fuckyouprivilegedwhitedude
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
There are way too many people I have fucked in this class for this not to be awkward
The pandemic has not made Uber drivers any less chatty.
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