I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
I just wanna be able to fart and do my homework but he won't leave
Bring me that man meat
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
