Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
so he let me use one of the toothbrushes that came in his daughters 4 pack, purple glittery toddler toothbrush, the next time i came back his wife has used their label maker and put my name on it...
I lost my virginity in that bed. You just layed in history.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
She judged ME for picking my nose when SHE has the clap.
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
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