I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
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