Turns out "bordello" doesn't mean what I thought it did.
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
so let's talk penis.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
They both just did a shot, head butted each other, did another shot and then slapped each other in the face. These could be the two guys we've been looking for all our lives
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
We're using joints as your birthday candles
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
He doesn't drink liquor so instead of doing a body shot off my belly button he dropped water in there and sipped it out with a straw. Look at my face: =|
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with someone crawling around my carpet for 3 hours trying to pick up spilled coke...
I never thought my Saturday night would end up with ME crawling around your carpet for 3 hours trying to save my investment.
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
