Does adding vodka to a protein shake defeat the purpose?
What the fuck. The girl next to me just looked at her phone, put her stuff away, and popped a birth control and ran out of class. Lucky fucking guy.
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
WHY AM I ALWAYS DEFEATED BY THE LATIN COCK?!?!
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I re-seduced my fuck buddy...must be the luck of the Irish!
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
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