Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
just come out here and I will go home with you...
I either just heard my neighbors having sex or she really agreed with whatever he was talking about.
I can hear her blowing you man. All I hear is her saying 'yeah' over and over again.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
So topless strobe light beer pong turned into me rugby tackling a bitch to the ground.my tits will never forgive me for sacrificing their majesticness for responsibility
Please do us both a favor and come rip my clothes off.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Tell him that his phone is taped to the dog's stomach. Stop trying to call it because it makes him scared.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
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