is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Incoming: this is a booty call. To accept, please reply with an appropriate time. To reject, please reply "N" and the information will be filed for future reference.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Just got hit on via LinkedIn..do I capitalize on this opportunity/land a job or reply something sassy
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Randomize
