i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
She's NOT homeless...she graduated early.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I just smoked weed with my physics professor. Tell me how my life is this.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Who wants to play the "pick up your shit from our floor because you're not paying rent or dating either of us" game?
This girl in my class is lecturing my professor about zombies. It has been going on for 15 minutes.
Zombies?
Zombies.
Randomize
