Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I couldn't tell if he was hitting on me or if he was just mentally challenged.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
a girl walking in front of me just packed her cigarettes 72 times and yes i counted
how much adderall did you take today?
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I'm staying in tonight, it's my Christmas present to my liver.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
My night has consisted of googling cat penises and creating a Tinder profile.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
