But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
I don't think brook has ever known best
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
jungle juice + heels + stairs = broken arm
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
They woke me up at 4 in the morning screaming "drunk adventure time!" because they needed a sober chaperone. They made me walk them around the block shoeless.
All I want is a guy who will love me and occasionally shave my balls.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Also that boy who jizzed in me wearing Cowboy boots and a plaid shirt snapped me at 4 am and said "I owe you a dinner. Sorry"
Drunk me really needs to stop 1. telling every attractive dude in a relationship that monogamy isn't real 2. Proposing threesomes with them and their girlfriends
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
Randomize
