So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Somebody left a mini pitcher in the bathroom. Think its safe?
For public speaking we have to bring an object that describes us to class. Can't decide if I wanna bring a flask or a shot glass.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Dang. We need a girls trip ASAP. Preferably in a country who has even lower standards than us on a Friday night.
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
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