Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
Dude, you walked in on me 5 times each times you had a different person with you. And each time you lifted the covers up and said 'whats going on in here'
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I found a picture of me as a little kid with nothing on except a towel covering one of my nipples and I'm glaring at the camera. Literally nothing has changed except I have boobs now
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
Ryan got so drunk he gave a hobo $20 and I had to zip tie him to the bed so he doesn't out stupid himself
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
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