found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
FUCK IM ABOUT TO GET A DICK PIC IN THE LIBRARY
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
in the past 2 days I've ruined2-3 lives, made 2 men quit the bar, started a Wednesdays only affair, ended it, ruined that engagement and had my tires slashed by a jealous bouncer. please stop letting me out....
Actually new year, new me. I haven’t had sex yet so technically I’ve been a virgin all year.
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