Taylor Swift is so right about you.
i wish i could just chop off my fat with a knife..i would rather endure that than work out
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
Fell off the toilet trying to reach to put my tampon in the garbage. Pride hurts real bad.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I thought he was a lobster and that the moon was going to pull me through him.
I don't think I should try acid.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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