Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Just flooded the bathroom while masturbating in the shower. Managed to squeege most of it up. Desperately need to get laid.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Pretty sure I scared him off for good. The lesbian in me is ecstatic.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
It happened again.
What?
I lost in a drinking contest with my 84 year old grandmother. Two years in a row now.
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
YOU BETTER TOUCH MY NIPPLES TODAY
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
Im 76 percent sure I took a fully clothed shower last night.
Randomize