doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
everyone is single if you try hard enough
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Bad Decision October is in full swing. I was telling people that "I put on eye makeup today, I'm takin' a dude home with me!".
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
you said "i met the love of my life tonight" and i said "me?" and you said "no, hummus"
You kept whispering to me that the guy making your burrito was an angel.
Okay first of all fuck you and everything you stand for because Taco Bell is amazing.
Randomize