so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So, I woke up to an empty bottle of scotch and a dead car. The last thing I remember are the strippers being mad at me. Awesome night.
Feels good to be wearing underwear again though...
the last thing i remember was trying to convince him to call over his girlfriend so we could have a threesome
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
You left your underwear on the fireplace
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
I woke up naked, with the lights on, using my backpack as a pillow and a pillow as a blanket.
my bowl and the doses are under your mom's passenger seat
repeat: THERE IS LSD AND THC IN YOUR MOM'S CAR. HELP ME HELP US AVOID FELONIES
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
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