I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
Every time you talk about your facial hair I immedately get horny
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Randomize
