I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
After I was kicked out of the last frat I blacked out, woke up in the hospital with no clothes no phone and no idea what happened last night. But i got hospital socks, thats a win in my book.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
Randomize
