omg omg i just fucked paul. i need to stop doing this kind of thing.
wait, who's paul?
exactly.
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I wish the holidays was like a drive thru. Get in. Get your presents. Get out.
Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?
Nah. I did too.
All I wanna do is sit in water and get drunk. The only thing more American is giving birth to eagles.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
He looked me straight in the eye when he was fingering me last night...it was very serial killer.
All I remember from last night is petting the broom with my feet and feeling like I was standing on a horses head
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Why does my therapist keep calling when I jerk off?
There is a goat eating lettuce out of our fridge. Do you wanna grab a bloody mary?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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