i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
I feel like a fucking princess. Like an heiress of a kingdom of drugs.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
So the chick throws up over the rail from the 15th floor at the sky bar and I knew I would take her back to my hotel.
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
10/10 dentists agree that he is one bangable mother fucker. hint: i am all of these dentists.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Randomize
