tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
This is the first month I have not taken plan B to get my period in over a year
And somehow that makes me sad knowing I haven't had raunchy unprotected sex in a month
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
turkey basters and jungle juice, is that really the whole shopping list for new year's?
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
I went to look at my notes for my take home final and all I had written was 'you're on E. You won't remember a damn thing anyway.'
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
It’s like I’m living in some alternate wet dream universe right now
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