Christians are straight up FREAKS
so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
I may or may not have slept in someones apt on your street because they told me I was fun sized like a mini snickers
We should be called the Road Head Warriors
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We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
We woke up, fucked twice, she drank 3 warm heinekins to cure her hangover and said "Im glad you're still hott when im sober"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do something fun then. Blow up the house or whatever.
How have you survived this long?
Dumb luck and a deal with the devil.
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
We where late for the party because we spent the last hour staring at a towl becase we thought it was a raccoon
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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