Nah got too drunk to function...probably could have dragged something home over my shoulder if the cops didn't roll
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
What do you mean how did you end up there? You told him he had a face you'd like to ride, that's a deal sealer in any language.
She refuses to believe she pulled down her pants and spanked her ass in front of us
I knew us throwing ourselves at him back in the day would pay off. I'm gonna b a divorcees rebound. Score!
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
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