Apparently they want to see what I've been working on for the last three months. Can I just hand them a bunch of empty fifths?
I wonder if i passed any courses from last semester
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Haha at least the one I have like that you can't tell we are completely drunk and you're about to kick a glass out of my hand in a fit of joy over pizza.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
Idk. It's not appealing to me. Like don't get me wrong, I love ur dick A LOT but I don't want to stare at it on an iPhone screen
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Nah it's alright, I'll just ride cock all the way to hell
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
