I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
The face that yo gabba gabba comes up when I'm stoned and searching for yoga workouts is scary or dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
He says we're "annoying" but that's an odd word to describe a couple of heroic liquor saiyans
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I'm wearing jeans from 7th grade and drinking a fucking macchiato. This better be a good day.
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