I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
You wrote me a letter and I cannot make out anything you wrote except the last sentence which says "tell the wolf ill meet him at sunset and that I'm sorrry"
A girl pulled up next to me at a stoplight just now, looked around for a second, and then changed her top, bra and all, before the light turned green. New. Hero.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
he gifted me a vibrator as he was breaking up with me. you tell me how my night went
I left my bra and a book at his place. He's a hot Scandinavian who is into physics and computers - had to step up my game.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
