She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
I dated that bitch for 9 months and didnt get as much as a hand job. I met her sister last night for the first time and smashed that...twice
I respect that
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
Just interrupted a freshman tour to ask where the sexual health center is. Figured I'd just give us all what we were really looking for.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
3 for 3 on getting girls who say "yolo" at the bar to have anal. Not the motto I live by, but it has changed my life.
Erry day erry day!
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
Yeah I just don't know how I feel about my fuck buddy coming to work at my dads office with me.
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Oh! I forgot to tell you. Part of that weird ass dream last night. I was jamie lee curtis and I cut off all my hair because yogurt.
Randomize
