Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
She gives me Chlamydia and somehow I'm still the asshole
I think my new low is running outside in a towel to pet a particularly fluffy looking squirrel and projectile vomiting off the balcony.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
My vagina feels like it's been kissed by angels.
I did the walk of shame this morning and his mom hugged me in the driveway
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
Randomize
