my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
i slept with him so i could steal the screens out of his sink faucets for my bowl when he went to sleep. not because he's funny.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's gonorrhea incarnate
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I walked out in my coconut bra, and that's when it all went downhill.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
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