OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i walked into the party and i guess everyone knew because they began to chant "ass to mouth"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
Well the streets were closed, so it was okay for me to just lay down for a little bit.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
I just drunk texted the Italian guy and now I’m flooded with Shane. Uh, shame, not Shane. He sounds nice, though.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize
