I think I just got seasick
you're not on a boat
he has a waterbed.
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
I guess I'm open to more types of dick now
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Found your bra in my backseat. And yes it took me that long to finally clean it out from last weekend
Didn't even know it was missing, if that makes you feel any better
Randomize
