There comes a time in every man's life where he has to shit in a catbox to prove a point.
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
And then you told me I had large hands and looked like a girl who would have an illegitimate child that I never talked about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
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