we were just talking about designated drivers and i suggested we each hire a mexican day laborer to give us piggy back rides... i have the best ideas eveeer
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
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