im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
I am the master of subtle flirting. I seduced him by simulating a hand job with an epi-pen during training.
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
He's reached the drunk point where he's trying to convince the family to buy falcons as pets. Can't wait to see how my steak turns out
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
I just ate broccoli before drinking. Does that make me a responsible adult?
Dude this weed has me so paranoid.
Yeah tell me about it I just screamed after I coughed because my own cough scared me.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
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