bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
Me. At least after what I've been through.
if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
i just assumed he broke up with her because she wasn't a freshman anymore
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I woke up in Brittany's thong, Tony's shirt, and an oven mitt
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize
