Pappa wants mamma naked
i have to go see a new gyno today. he's a male. i just took 3 shots of tequila. its almost like freshman year... drink alcohol, meet a strange man, let him play with my vagina.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
How do you tell an ex that banging less hot chicks than me is highly insulting? I almost want to try and get him laid with a pretty girl just to save some face for dating him so long.
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
Ladies and gentlemen, the only person I know who would keg stand in pearls and a bow.
he woke me up with all the stuff I had at his house in boxes i had to unwrap my own belongings and he said. Happy v-day its time to see ya day! Worst day ever
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
Did you hear about the guy wearing a spiderman mask running around naked with a bottle of patron?
Yeah.
I was spiderman.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
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