He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
She was holding a turtle doing a beer bong out of a flower watering can.
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
New discovery: your vibrator works on my balls. Technology is wonderful I love the future
I just watched a porn called gay of thrones and I think I've reached a new low in my life
What, so now you are his nutritionist and his fuck buddy?
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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