well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
I've eaten ice cream, mentos, an extreme gulp and swedish fish today. i feel like diabetes. the actual disease not a person with it.
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
He barely got in the door before she began to shriek like a banshee and punch him. His rainbow wig is still hanging from the front porch as a "warning to all other clowns".
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
I made out with drunk Joe Dirt and then put his mullet wig on for him. True Halloween romance.
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
You took his virginity and then he got lost on his way back to his hotel room... We found him at 3am sitting on the sidewalk crying. Kudos.
Randomize
