How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like puking into an empty cooler at a red light on the way to get plan b.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Paris has not been good for her. Everytime she has a one night stand from a different country, she buys a mini flag and tapes it to her wall with the others
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
The multiple male orgasm is a real thing. I've seen it. I've caused it. I called him a unicorn.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
But don't thank me for faking being asleep, if I was the real wing man, I would have left the bed
I'm currently in h&m wondering "what exactly is the class level of a swingers resort?"
Get ready tonight we are going to get drunk and pierce my nipples
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