How drunk are you??
I'm flawless.
pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
tagging him in all 73 close-ups of your cleavage might have been a little obvious.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
How drunk do you guys plan on getting?
We wrote our addresses on our arms for the cab driver, what do you think?
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize
