Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
i just tried to use a string cheese as a light source
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
I'm praying to the gods of sex we both get laid this weekend. Amen. Love you
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
Randomize
