We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
I was debating whether her purse was real then I saw her puke in it.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
Nope. Flying out tonight. Staying with my great aunt who is an ex nun turned hostel owner. Best and likely most dangerous St. Patty's Day to commence in 10 hours. IRELAND!
Be safe. And I hate you.
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
I got a charlie horse in my ass while masturbating. We are never been going to that boot camp again.
Where do you think your fantastically immense lady-boner for men in uniform comes from?
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize