Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
Sex on bubble wrap = best decision ever.
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Some girl, somewhere, is going to wake up with my face paint on her vagina
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Learned a valuable life lesson last night. It's titled "Tequila: Still A Bad Idea".
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
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