Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I got into my dads silver toyota in the back seat to get picked up and 2 mins later I asked my dad when are we leaving, then an old mexican woman turned around. wrong toyota I'm guessing.
I checked into jail on foursquare
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
The gay viking and his eqyptian 'queen' hooked up on our couches. They pushed them together to make a bed. Innovative, but awkward to come home from work to at 7 am.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I told him to take the baby so I could work out. My workout consisted of getting high and masturbating
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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