Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
Once you realized you couldn't finish the 30 you started walking down the street and leaving a beer in everyone's mailbox
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They just came out of my bathroom and asked if I could spare them a condom. See. Its a good thing I have some.
Just went through the drive thru and got 18 free donuts in exchange for half a joint. Dunkin Donuts at midnight might become a nightly thing for us.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is a 'Dr. Willy Fister Gynecologist' costume appropriate for work?
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
Randomize