are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Yeah..And after he fingered me, he wiped it on my face and laughed.
ew wtf
well you can't waste a boner
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
it's all fun and games til I text you in last nights clothes with a head bleed
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
Dude...itll be a youre-still-a-dick-but-a-hot-one-angry-hate-evil-spite kinda fuck. This is acceptable.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
